My Journey Back To Faith, Part 2

My mother has a daily devotional book, Jesus Calling, that sits on the kitchen table.  I've taken to picking it up in the morning, especially when I'm feeling lousy, and whatever the devotion happens to be for that particular day never fails to be totally relevant to how I'm feeling.  Never fails.
Monday I spent all day at work in front of the computer processing pill counts and suspensions for dispensing.  It's good because it doesn't require heavy lifting, but it gets a little repetitive, so I had a lot of time to think.  My mind would wander back to whether or not I had made the right career move.  Doubt and worry about my future set in.  So yesterday morning I picked up the devotional and the words leaped off the page and damn near smacked me in the face.

June 18
YOU ARE MY BELOVED CHILD.  I chose you to be the foundation of the world, to walk with Me along the paths designed specifically for you.  Concentrate on keeping in step with Me, instead of trying to anticipate My plans for you.  If you trust that My plans are to prosper you and not to harm you, you can relax and enjoy the present moment. 
Your hope and your future are rooted in heaven, where eternal ecstasy awaits you.  Nothing can rob you of your inheritance of unimaginable riches and well-being.  Sometimes I grant you glimpses of your glorious future, to encourage you and spur you on.  But your main focus should be staying close to Me.  I set the pace in keeping with your needs and My purposes.

Boom!  There it was, exactly what I needed to hear, because my struggle right now is focusing too much time and energy on things I cannot control and therefore I have a very hard time relaxing and enjoying the present moment.
I'm not ashamed that I've chosen to rekindle my relationship with God.  It has made a huge difference in my life.  Where there was once nothing but darkness I now see light.  I'm slowly starting to feel peace come back into my life.  I'm learning that the struggles I experience in my head can and will be overcome.  I'm learning to accept that life isn't and never will be perfect or what I expect it to be, and to be thankful for the blessings I do have.

To be continued...