My Journey Back To Faith

I took the day off last Wednesday because the pain in my chest was pretty unbearable and I needed a mental health break as well.
I started experiencing severe chest pains at work last Friday and ended up in my doctor's office.  All of the tests they ran showed that it wasn't my heart, thank God.  (They were able to see me immediately and wanted to prevent an emergency room trip if at all possible and I'm glad they did because that wouldn't have been necessary.)  Turns out I have costochondritis, and all I can do is manage the pain until it goes away on its own, plus make sure I take it easy so as not to aggravate it or slow down the healing process.  Very frustrating for someone whose job entails plenty of heavy lifting and someone who also goes to the gym frequently.  But again, I'm so thankful that my heart is just fine.
So I took it easy last Wednesday and decided to read most of the day.  I haven't had the luxury to sit down with a book, uninterrupted, for a long time.  Before I picked one up, settling on How To Save Your Own Life by Erica Jong, one I've already read but in a previous life, I sat down and started making a list of things I need to remind myself of on a daily basis.
Like,
-  I can't stress about tomorrow because it's out of my control.
-  I can't stress over money because I have a full time job and my bills are getting paid.
-  I can't worry about the things I have no control over.
-  I must choose to enjoy the present.  Not dwell in the past or mull over the future.
-  I am thankful for all I do have and won't concern myself with what I don't have.
Sometimes I get so down on myself, so immersed in my own head, that I end up feeling like a lousy human being.  I forget how far I've come this past year.  I dwell on the negatives, like I've said before, instead of focusing on the positives.  And sometimes I even take the positives and spin them into negatives.  It's a vicious cycle that I am trying desperately to put an end to.

To be continued...