Gimme Some Sugar, Baby, Part II

"One night stands can be nothing more than a few hours of pleasure, or they can be the beginning of something much more important, and it's impossible to tell until it's too late...
[That is] the real danger of a one night stand.  Not that it will lead to nothing, but that it will lead to everything.  In this way, casual sex is excruciatingly hazardous.  Those who are not ready to have their lives changed should probably abstain."


To be continued...

Gimme Some Sugar, Baby, Part I

Currently reading.  My favorite essay so far is called "Sex With A Stranger," written by Susan Cheever.

"If you are looking for love, sexual intimacy can be a shortcut.  It is among the fastest ways to get to know another person.  During sex, we literally and figuratively expose ourselves.  We show physical parts that are usually kept covered; we display our private likes and dislikes.  In its moments of unconscious response to physical pleasure, the body reveals a great deal of information:  a need to dominate, a difficulty following suggestions, an inability to express desires.  If we have trouble letting go or if we are painfully uncomfortable with how we look, it often shows up in the two-person drama of the sex act."


This little essay has inspired me to write about my experiences with one night stands.  Stay tuned.

Driving Home From Port Richmond On No Sleep Is NOT A Good Idea

The other night one of my boys and I were talking, and I pointed out his love of crazy bitches. More specifically, the love most guys have for those psychopathic, unstable women that will turn around and slash your tires out of the blue. 

"I may be slightly crazy, but I am not about to throw a brick through your front window."  (I said this specifically because I was referring to a story we both knew well.)
Unless you give me a valid reason to make sure your big, pretty truck somehow how manages to wind up at the bottom of the Christiana River.  Whatever.  That only happened once. 
He looked at me with wide eyes and replied, "You and I are the same!  We are huge sluts and that means we automatically have huge issues!"  He made a big, sweeping gesture with his arms to emphasize the word huge.  At least, I'm pretty sure he did.  I was a couple of drinks in at this point.

It's a concept I will never understand.  Granted, I used to be much worse off than I am now.  But I've realized that wasting crazy energy on men is simply not worth my time.  I'd rather utilize that energy and put it into writing, partying, or any kind of physical labor that leaves my muscles sore and gives me reason to be proud of myself.  Because truthfully, no one out there is worth my mental stability.
So why do the boys always go crawling back to the tire-slashing bitches?  I really want to understand this.

One guy I dated started seeing this psychopathic, fucked up, raging bitch of a...woman, who I believe was an alcoholic and I'm pretty sure she was some form of junkie, right after I severed all ties with him.  (Yeah yeah, we eventually started "seeing" each other again...)  Apparently she had him arrested on more than one occasion for terroristic threatening.  I remember pissing this guy off quite a few times, but terroristic threatening?  Nah.  Did I hate his guts and want to hurt him after he scorned me?  Sure.  But to fucking call the cops and deal with going to court and all of that bullshit?  No thanks.
"Why do you put up with her?"
"She's good in the sack."
"So you'd risk having your cock fall off (because she was, let's face it, skanky,) and going to jail just to keep sleeping with her?"
No response.

Another guy I was involved with had a psycho, alcoholic girlfriend who would get trashed in public and make an ass of herself and he was the poor sap who had to deal with her.  She was the brick-throwing bitch.  One time she wrecked the entire front end of his truck.  Another time, we were stripping down to get busy and I noticed claw marks across his chest. 
"Dude, really?"
He gives me this stupid, sheepish look.
"Yeah she came at me the other day.  I know, I know, but it's kind of...hot."
Oh sure, destruction of personal property and physical harm to one's significant other is hot.  But I must say here that the claw marks I left on his back after a particularly intense round of fucking were so much hotter. 

Am I the only one that sees something wrong with this picture?  I don't want to go off the deep end, (even though I'm pretty much there already,) just to keep some guy around.  Sometimes I feel like throwing up my hands and saying, "You want crazy?  I'll give you fucking crazy."
Even though I will keep you on your toes and there will never be a dull moment when you're with me.  You know, minus involving the police and making your life a living hell.

Eye Candy For Me

Excerpts From...

"...the illogic of fact has made the history of beautiful women coextensive with the history of miserable, depressed women."

"These days the only female role more entrancing than the darkly, distraughtly bad is the small town sweetheart who drips sugar and saccharine for all the world to see but is in fact full of lust and evil (which are one and the same in woman) and malice and bad thoughts in her secret, sinful Jungian shadow life."

"...the world does not have room for women with big, strong personalities - it simply will not tolerate their existence past a certain point, so they just kind of have to behave periodically - if they're smart."

"But it is strange that all the qualities that are supposed to make a woman desirable also make her a target of disquiet and distrust."

"...it seems that male fear of world's free-wheeling, devastating, difficult and complicated women is actually obviating a hell of a good time."

"Most guys do not want to get involved with a girl on fire - the ones who do seem only to want to add fuel to the flames, but very few seem interested in finding a bucket of water."

"Feminism, and art that has a feminist agenda, serves to remind us of all the things we could be, all the shackles we can shed from our lives if we wish. It reminds us that we can be anything we want to be this time around."

"People romanticize insanity because they believe it is the thing behind the art; in fact, it is the thing in front of the art, the roadblock and police barrier and phantom tollbooth that you are pushing against."

"Linda Evangelista said she doesn't get out of bed for less than $15,000 a day. Somewhere on earth there are women who don't get INTO bed for less than $15,000 a night. And I guess the rest of us have learned to settle."

"What is anyone going to say to the many of us out there who have been confronted by some version of a man's violent temper and have found ourselves excited, pulled in, taken in, turned on? How can we deny the draw, the obsessive grab of images and pain, whose force has no equal and goes unopposed in a society that has denied us the ecstasy of a god, of a religious explosion of delight, so that happiness has come to seem ho-hum and only our pain - our deep, bloody, undeniable pain - gives us the sense that we can feel at all?"

"...raise [their] daughters as if it's possible that they will grow up to be President of the United States or CEO of Microsoft or the doctor who finds a cure for AIDS or the economist who discovers a way to end the inversely proportionate relationship between unemployment and inflation. Raise your daughters to laugh at any man who even THINKS about throwing a punch, and raise them to be people with Filofaxes full of activities that are too fun and important and fascinating to be disturbed by a blow to the right eye. Raise your daughters to always think that any unpleasant situation - be it with a man or a manager or any of the expendable and fruitless annoyances that ruin our lives - just isn't worth it. Nobody NEEDS this, I don't want it, I'm outta here, there are better things to do, anyone who disagrees can fuck off and die."